I surprised myself after the break up. I hadn’t really cried. I was sad, and I was mad. But I dealt with these things as I normally do, I let them go, brushed them off. I let them go because I refused to let them impact my spiritual progress (little did I know that was doing the opposite). I wondered if this was normal. If it was too simple. If it was even addressing the issue. I asked my therapist if I was dealing with things properly…
This question turned in to a long conversation about processing emotions. And even after I went home I opened up my Instagram and it seemed that every other post on my feed was speaking to me about this. Go figure we’re all human.
Here’s five general points that sat well with me, and still do…
So how do you do this? I sat in my basement apartment, locked the door, grabbed a tea and I started writing. I sat with myself for hours, and I wrote and cried, and wrote mean things (which I later burnt) and cried, and wrote all of the feelings I was ashamed to admit and cried some more. I called my mom and was grateful that she created space for me to continue crying, to vent, and then to be comforted. I asked her to tell me everything would be okay. I knew in my heart that it would be (that’s the key to not sitting in your shit) but I needed her to say it.
Essentially I gave myself permission to feel. To REALLY FEEL.
****There may be some of you reading this that don’t feel safe allowing yourself to fully feel, and please know that’s ok. Maybe its not time yet, or maybe you can talk to someone about how to create a safe space for you to do this.
It’s important to find a way that works specifically for you. It will look different for everyone. Maybe you need to listen to sappy love songs, or loud screamer songs. Maybe you need to go to a rage room, or just call a close friend that allows you to vent fully without judgment. Maybe you need to do some painting, or go sit near the lake. Whatever it looks like, when the tears start flowin, DON’T STOP THEM! Allow them – give yourself permission to feel them. Pay attention to how the energy feels making it’s way through your body, and in to your heart. Once it’s in your heart your soul will know when it’s ready to be released ❤✌